Notes from a COVID Vaccine Sommelier

 

As more and more vaccines come onto the market, people are having a hard time deciding which vaccine to get. Until now a vaccine was simply a vaccine – your basic vaccine ordinaire. Now you have many many choices. My job as a vaccine sommelier is to educate people on the subtleties’ of fine vaccines and help them make the right choices.

For example suppose you are planning to take a cruise to the Caribbean. You don’t want to trust this to just any old vaccine, but one that mates well with your particular Caribbean Cruises. It also matters which islands you plan on going to and whether this will be a very small sailing yacht cruise or on one of those megaships.

For the former ,say a small sailing yacht with about 20 close friends, I’d recommend a 2020 Astra Zennaca two shot vaccine. This has a CDC 4 “COVID” rating which makes it an excellent choice. Its efficacy is 80 percent. It’s injections are easy  and relatively painless with only minimal side effects lasting no more than12 hours. Since the stopovers will be limited to exclusive islands and you will be staying on the yacht, there should be no need for additional boosters.

Now for the later, say one of the big 6000 passenger megaliner ships, I would not recommend anything less than the two shot Pfzier vaccine. This has gotten a 5 COVID rating by even the most discriminating CDC officials. I must warn you though that it must be chilled to the proper temperature before serving, and it tends not to travel well. Therefore I would not recommend buying it long in advance of administering it.

Now let’s say you are planning a multicounty 21 day vacation by air, bus and rail. In that case I’d go with a 2021 2 shot Moderna  late release vaccine. While the 2021 J&J might suffice, it only got a 3 COVID rating from the CDC vs. a 4 for the Moderna. The Moderna has a very smooth entry with only a slight sting. and a mild achy finish lasting for a day or more. It stands up well to a number of mutant variations including the Danish, Brazilian, and South African varieties.

Many people have asked me “should I take the vaccine immediately, or will it continue to age well in the refrigerator?” That is still too soon to answer for many of the vaccines since there have not yet been sufficient vintages to determine how well they might age under ideal conditions. The Pfizer vaccine should definitely not be stored for more than 24 hours, but there have been reports that the Oxford vaccine from Europe has the potential for a long staying power that will only improve with age. Early batches of this have already been snatched up by connoisseurs in hope they will just increase in value in time.

Before I leave I want to say that the J&J (Johnson & Johnson) should be considered  as a wise pick for most local uses. The 2021 is an excellent vintage. It is well balanced and aged in stainless steel vats 30 days before being decanted into vials. While some ignorant critics have “dissed “it for supposedly being derived from “aborted fetuses”, this is perhaps the most stupid argument I’ve ever heard for ignoring such a noble label. While only receiving 3 COVIDs from the CDC, it has stood up will to most variants and only requires a single does. While it is unlikely to improve with age, it does not need to be stored at cellar temperature, so it makes the perfect gift to bring to gatherings in this post pandemic world.