Satirical News Service
Washington, DC
In a statement issued to FOX News today, Trump announced what he would do to end the strike at Boeing Aircraft and answer many concerns about their lack of safety. In his statement he said,
“On day one I
would nationalize Boeing and fire all the striking workers - they’re lazy and incompetent.
I’d replace them all with 13-year-old
boys. Have you ever seen how fast they can assemble one of those plastic
model airplanes? It's incredible! If they can put together one of those, they can assemble a
real airplane. Besides, they are the only ones who can fit in those tiny seats they
plan on putting in all the planes now. Best of all, we'll only pay them $2.50 an hour with no benefits and they'll be thrilled with it. All the
managers would go too. I’d put my best friend Elon 'jumping-jack-flash' Musk in charge of the whole company. He'll Make Flying Great Again!"
