Satirical
News Service
Washington, DC
To show voters that he is better at solving International Disputes, Donald Trump rolled out his own plan
for what to do about Gaza and Palestine. According to Trump,
“There
are millions of people right now in Gaze with no place to go because Egypt won’t
let them settle there, and Israel feels they are to much of threat to stay
there. I propose we send them to Greenland! I’ll even buy it myself with my own Billions
of Dollars that I’m making from the sale the My Trump Network. There will be no
bombings there by Israel or anyone else.
They’ll be totally isolated so they can practice any damn radical Islamic religion they
want without being a threat to their neighbors. Rebuilding would be easy too since
there is plenty of snow and ice there to make igloos. They even say that parts
of Greenland are desert, so they’d be right at home there. “
Although
the last time he tried to “buy Greenland” the Danish weren’t too happy about
it, this time he said “I’ll make them an offer they can’t refuse.”
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