Satirical News service
Philadelphia, PA
Following a recent episode where a Kentucky bound airliner was forced to divert and land because an Orthodox Jewish passenger donned a teffillin – a small leather prayer box that is wound to the body with leather straps – and started praying in Hebrew, the TSA announced today that it would ban all religion on US flights.
From now on the TSA will no longer allow any religious objects or prayers aboard any airplane. Passengers wearing any religious objects such as crucifixes or star-of-davids, will be required to place them in a small plastic bag prior to going through security and boarding a plane. Some exemptions will be allowed for certified clergy, but they must obtain and show a certificate from their diocese indicating that they are an ordained minister. Passengers who feel the need to pray will only be permitted to pray silently and unobtrusively 10 minutes before take off, and after the aircraft has touched down on the runway. Under no circumstances will any religious objects be permitted to be used in prayers, nor may passengers pray out loud. Quoting one official from the TSA, “We are doing this in the interest of protecting passengers from potential terrorists.”
Original Satire from
Steven Friedman
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