Satirical News Service
A Texas man proclaiming himself to be the “Angel of Death” has tested positive for the Ebola virus. He is refusing to be quarantined on the basis that it violates his Second Amendment Right to bear arms. He claims that a biological weapon is just like any other weapon and he has the Constitutional Right to carry arms (or in his case be one). "I can’t infect anyone", he claims, "unless I intentionally do so. Until that time I am just like any other citizen carrying a concealed weapon, which is allowed under the constitution and the State of Texas".
In a strange twist of allegiances, the NRA has sided with the man. In a statement given to the press, they said, “If we don’t uphold this mans’ right to carry biological weapons, the next thing you know the Government is going to take away your handguns. “