Satirical News ServiceTampa. FL
Dinesh D’Souza, the film maker who recently made O’bama 2016, has announced plans to remake the film Saving Private Ryan. In this version of the film, Paul Ryan has lost all of his ultra-conservative brothers in bitter primary fights. He and Captain Miller (played by Mitt Romney) are barricaded in a Cayman Islands Bank besieged by US government Tax collectors who are demanding their tax returns for the last 10 years. With only with a handful of die hard conservatives , armed with just a few banking and Wall Street de-regulations and Medicare vouchers, they battle off the persistent tax collectors. In the final scene Captain Miller (Mitt Romney) is hopelessly confronted by a large government armored car determined to take more than 13% of his declared income. Out of the blue comes a private Jet dropping 10,000 hard bound copies of Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged on the armored car. As Miller (Mitt Romney) lay dying he turns to Paul Ryan, pointing to the Cayman Island bank that they saved, in his dying breath says “Earn this….!” As the movie ends a not much older but now wiser Ryan vows to end Medicare, Cut taxes the rich, and end all Federal entitlement programs. The final scene cuts to a brave heroic Ryan standing steadfast against a silhouetted Cayman Islands Flag.