Let’s Privatize this War

For once I am in full agreement with the Tea Party and Neoncons. We need to cut Big Government and reduce the National Dept, and not have any timetable for ending the war in Afganistan. Since they also firmly believe that all government agencies are totally inept, I suggest we privatize the biggest one of all. The US Military.
I suggest we start by issuing IPO’s for specific conflicts – like the War in Afghanistan. Free Market entrepreneurs could purchase stock in the war just as they could in say General Motors (as if anyone actually would do that right now). Instead of relying on generals with little vested interest in the wars telling us how the war is going, the average Joe could see for himself just by looking at the stock performance. Banks could also get into the fray too by offering CDO’s or those weird derivatives that hedges their bets in case the Taliban actually do win this war. That way they could still make a killing (so to speak!) if we lose.
The war could be run just like any corporation with competent CEO’s like…., well I can’t really think of any right now, but I’ll get back to you on that ……
To save costs we could lay off thousands of soldiers who are not actually shooting weapons, and we could outsource those jobs to China, the Philippines, or India just like we do all the other jobs.
We could also cut out waste and reduce the size of government by eliminating the VA just as the Tea Party Folks are currently advocating. Instead of offering Big Government Run Health Care that everyone knows is bad for us, we could offer them the same health benefits that ordinary workers get, through CIGNA or Blue Cross. Of course we’d probably have to raise their salary because with their share of the premiums alone they’d, they’d end up owing more than they get paid. Likewise these plans would have to not cover certain things - like getting shot or getting blown up by IED’s.
Companies like Blackwater Security already have shown us that Private Enterprise can do the job much better than Big Government, so let them take over this thing and use the money where it is really needed - on Tax Breaks for the Super Rich!.

Editorial by
Steven Friedman