Satirical News Service
Washington DC
In a never-ending attempt to fleece his supporters, The Trump Empire announced that it was
creating its very own Cryptocurrency called “Fuls”. Naturally each of these “virtual tokens” bears
the likeness of Donald himself. The initial value of each of these “Fuls” was declared
to be 1.5 million dollars by the organization, but savvy investors say it is
actually worthless. The Trump Organization says that it could be used in the future
to buy specific things – like pardons, judicial appointments, political appointments,
and even whole elections. They are
hoping that wealthy Russian oligarchs who are starting to get very nervous
about their financial investments would switch to something that they feel
would offer them more stability. It is rumored that Paul Manafort would head
the Trump Organization’s new enterprise in exchange for his continued silence “on
certain matters”.
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