Satirical News Service
Washington DC
After a nearly a full year of natural disasters, blizzards, soaring heat waves, floods, tornadoes, famine, and fires, Standard & Poor's has downgraded JEHOVA's rating to single "A".
According to one spokesperson for S&P, "We feel in light of these and other events this year, we really have to re-examine JEHOVA's ability to remain all powerful and prevent these things from occurring." "The latest stock market crash is just one more example of people's faith in the Almighty's ability to prevent catastrophe being shaken."
The single "A" rating, down from "AAA+", means that praying to JEHOVA carries about the same weight as praying to Ishtar or perhaps Odin. On the news of this downgrade many people rushed to put their faith in other supreme powers such as the almighty dollar, golden calves and Donald Trump.
In unrelated news the CFO of Standard and Poor's was killed in a freak lightening strike while on the golf course shortly after this news was released.
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