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Tuesday, August 18, 2020

Trump “Greatest Thing Ever Done for Women”

 


Satirical News Service
Washington DC

 In a bold move, Donald Trump today posthumously pardoned Susan B Anthony for convicted crimes nearly a century and a half ago.  In his signing ceremony, Trump touted

“This is the greatest thing ever done for women. Nobody ever thought to do this, but I did. Now that she is pardoned she can go walk free in heaven – or wherever she is now – and say Donald Trump had the courage to pardon me when no one else would. He’s the greatest President there ever was for women. Nobody knew that you could pardon dead people. I’m thinking maybe of pardoning some more dead women like Lizzie Borden – terrible miscarriage of justice."

In his statement, he went on to say “This was a sad time where many people felt it was fine to discriminate against women by denying them the right to vote. I have no such prejudice. I want to deny everyone equally the right to vote (well except for my base of loyal supporters)".


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