Satirical News Service
Hartford, Connecticut
The mysterious powerball winner in the Connecticut Powerball Lottery, shown here fronted by three wealthy bank executives, stated today that although he was sorry the 254 million dollars wasn't as much as his bonus this year, he still plans to put the money to good use and buy the country of Greece. When asked why, he stated he felt sorry for all those wealthy Greek shipping magnets who now are feeling the hardship of actually having to pay taxes for the first time in their lives. "I plan to make Greece a tax haven for the rich so that the wealthy 1%'ers will always have a place to go and never have to pay a cent in taxes."
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