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Monday, November 7, 2016

Don’t Live in Loser America – Move to Donald Trumpland


Okay, so Crooked Hillary managed to steal this election. You know what? America is a total loser! Who wants to live there anyway? So to my loyal followers who don’t want to live under the tyranny of Crooked Hillary. I’m offering my loyal followers a better place. It’ll be the best place on the whole planet! It’ll be huge!

Donald Trumpland

Donald Trumpland is an entire island completely owned and governed by me. Believe me, it’ll be the greatest place to live in the world. It’ll be so secure you won’t have to worry about illegal immigrants from Mexico coming to rape and murder you. You won’t have to worry about ISIS terrorists coming to kill you. You can keep your guns and believe me, my security people will make sure that Trump Lives matter!


So how do you sign up. After a vetting process to make sure you are the right kind of person, you only have to put up $300,000 to the Donald Trumpland Foundation, but my Donald Trumpland Bank, will provide you with very reasonable loan rates. You can also lease land to build your dream home and built by Trump Building Company protected by walls that I will even pay for, at prices starting in the mid 200’s. My taxes will be the lowest in the world. They’ll be so low you’ll say, “Please Donald, can’t I pay more?” It will be huge! Think about it people. Isn’t this better than living in a loser country run by Crooked Hillary or a socialist country like Canada?

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