Disclaimer

FAKE NEWS (just seems like it could be true)

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

NATION FACES CRITICAL SHORTAGE OF ATTACK AD CREATORS

Satirical News Service
Washington DC

Long lines of people representing Super PACs wait a change to purchase new attack ads

With the presidential campaign season heating up at a record pace, there now appears to be a critical shortage of attack ad writers in this country. With attack ads running as many as 12 per hour in states like Florida, writers and producers simply cannot keep up with the demand.

According to an un-named ad agency that formerly produced ads for snack foods and diapers, they say that they have had to redirect all their people to creating attack ads for Super PACS’s. We are running 24 hours a day and still cannot keep up with the demand. There just aren’t enough trained attack ad writers in this country right now. Our previous source of writers came from English majors, Political Science majors, and Media Communication majors. But over the past 10 years, many of those people have gone toward careers in Finance and Economics or Computer Technology. Now these grads are a dime a dozen, but they lack the verbal skills to create a truly vitriolic attack ad. One idea that was tried was to outsource these jobs to China and India, but the results were catastrophic. They just could master the idiom. What is really needed is a federally funded program to train people to create political attack ads like the ones that attack federally funded programs to train people to create attacks ads. Right now there is a long wait for any new ads even as more Super PAC money pours in.

One huge impact this is going to have is a on the Super Bowl that traditionally is the showcase for agency to show off new creative ads. With so many people involved in writing political attacks ads, you’re going to see far less of these Super Bowl ads, and a lot less creative.




No comments:

Post a Comment