Satirical News Service
Washington DC
Washington DC
Following
recent revelations about Ben Carson’s alleged stabbing being fabricated, and
now his stated acceptance to West Point also untrue, Ben Carson finally came
clean about one other thing. “I’m not really Black”, he announced today. “Frankly”,
he went on “I’m amazed no one caught on to this before. I mean what Black man
talks like this, and holds such insane views as I do? I figured – surely they’d see right through
this disguise- but I kept rising in the polls. So I kept it up. I hate Soul
food! – that should have clued people, but here I am, Black like me, but not
really.”
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