Republican’s Call for a Cessation of President’s Day Until They Can Get Elected

Satirical News Service
Washington DC

House Leader Mitch McConnell today called on his fellow Republicans to vote on banning all celebrations of President’s Day until they can get a Republican back in the White House. He said in an interview, “We should reserve this sacred holiday only for great Republican Presidents like Herbert Hoover, Richard Nixon, and whoever we can get elected in the next election. We are calling on Congress to pass a law suspending the holiday until then. Instead, we propose a national day dedicated to investigating Hillary Clinton’s emails.”