Satirical News Service
Washington DC
Martin Shkreli, the former Hedge fund manager who recently jacked up the price of a drug 4000%, is now being seriously considered by Republicans for the VP spot on the ticket. An un-named source high up in the Republican Party stated“Martin Shkreli embodies all of the values the Republican party holds dear – Un-restrained greed, un-bridled capitalism, blatant lack of compassion, and unquestioned willingness to make enormous profits on the backs of sick people”. While he does not profess to be anti-gay”, one Republican staffer added, “the fact that the drug he jacked the price up on is used to treat AIDS can’t hurt.” According to Martin Shkreli’s press secretary he has already been approached by high ranking staffers from several of the Candidates.
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