Disclaimer

FAKE NEWS (just seems like it could be true)

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

The State of Kentucky Decides to Opt out of United States for Religious Reasons

Satirical News Service
Frankfort, KY


In a stunning announcement yesterday, the State Legislature of Kentucky, whose body is made up largely of Fundamentalist Christians, has announced that hence forth they are opting out of being a State in the Union for religious reasons. 
          As they stated in their Declaration of Christian Independence, “The United States has become too anti-Christian by requiring them to uphold the laws equally to Fundamentalist Christians and all others. For this reason the State of Kentucky has decided to ‘opt out’ of the United States. We will henceforth be known as the Fundamentalist Christian State of Kentucky"
        Current residents of that state can choose to stay provided they declare their unconditional allegiance to Jesus Christ and the belief that every word in the Bible is true and unequivocal. They must also show proof of being heterosexual, although details of how this will be determined have yet to be worked out. All those who do not want to adhere to these requirements are free to leave the state.
         As one state representative stated “It is our First Amendment Right of Religious Freedom to do this action”. 

No comments:

Post a Comment