Satirical News Service
Washington, D.C.
Washington, D.C.
Tragically, nearly all of the more than 4000
servicemen and women who were scheduled for deployment to Afghanistan following
President Trumps “new” plan to win the 16 year old war have become afflicted
with crippling bone spurs in their feet. In a letter sent to the White House
from those servicemen and women they stated.
Dear Mr. Trump:
We
are dreadfully sorry that we will be unable to participate in your new effort
to win the war in Afghanistan. As you well know bone spurs can be quite debilitating
and certainly prevent us from participating in this escapade, as much as we’d
love to win the war for you. May we suggest as replacements you send members of
your own family, Paul Ryan, your friends in Goldman Sachs, the KKK, the Neo-Nazi, and all
the para-military groups that say they are just “dying to go over there”. Good
luck!
Regretfully,
US servicemen and women scheduled for deployment
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